Switchin' and Moanin'

Whilst japes, it will be interesting to see how Nintendo do it next year. My satirical Switch complaint is that the eShop market is being flooded, so devs will not make the money they think they should, resulting in them abandoning the Switch. As Nintendo pretty much only have one console, this abandonment will cause their doom.

Spla2n is a higher tier than you'll ever be, Kielty, don't you speak another unkind worst against my beautiful squids again.

They've already got 2 Bayonetta games coming next year - 2k17 has already been topped.

Crumpy Andy wrote:

They've already got 2 Bayonetta games coming next year - 2k17 has already been topped.

Along with a proper Fire Embelm now that is top tier.

Drunkalilly wrote:

Spla2n is a higher tier than you'll ever be, Kielty, don't you speak another unkind worst against my beautiful squids again.

They are indeed worst.

Unkind worst

The Switch has too many pixel art games coming out!  How dare we get all these games like Celeste, Shovel Knight, Hyper Light Drifter, Nidhogg II, Blossom Tales, Project Octopath and the like?  They all look exactly the same!  DAMN IT NINTENDO, give us more greyish-brown 'realistic' games!


(Adapted from the following, genuinely found on and copied verbatim from The Internet: 'Too many pixelated games on Switch, they're all very samey')

I've seen Nintendo fans actually say those things.

I know, right? Pixel art and chiptunes are a medium through which an artist can express many different characters and emotions. A blanket dislike of either makes absolutely zero sense.

Nintendo were going to announce some more games today, but then they didn't because there was a natural disaster and people died but who cares, announcing games today that I didn't know were going to be announced until yesterday is more important, and the Switch has no games apart from all of the games it has so it really needed this Direct and now it's not happening (except when it does) and I AM VERY ANGRY WITH IT ALL.

You don't want a gamer controversy on your hands, Nintendo. Don't make me explain why. You just.

Don't.

Least one thing is true

Balladeer wrote:

Nintendo were going to announce some more games today, but then they didn't because there was a natural disaster and people died but who cares, announcing games today that I didn't know were going to be announced until yesterday is more important, and the Switch has no games apart from all of the games it has so it really needed this Direct and now it's not happening (except when it does) and I AM VERY ANGRY WITH IT ALL.

You don't want a gamer controversy on your hands, Nintendo.  Don't make me explain why.  You just.

Don't.

I forgot the concept of this thread and was very confused for a moment there.

I can't believe those cowards at Nintendo let themselves be cucked by a silly little thing like the Earth tearing itself asunder in wrath.

JayMoyles wrote:

I forgot the concept of this thread and was very confused for a moment there.

Jay, you should know not to take anything anyone posts in here seriously! Not me, not Drunka, and certainly not Mas.

Now, do you take this seriously or not...?

It's all very well, Nintendo introducing this machine that can be played on the telly or in bed, but did they stop and think that the Switch might be too convenient? That people with low attention spans might, by its off-telly antics, be able to be distracted into playing Smash at any time when they should be doing something else? That this convenience might, in fact, destroy lives!?

No. No they did not.

I bet Balla played Smash for like 90 minutes and now thinks he's done a "life destroying" gaming session.

You're right, how dare I use ridiculous hyperbole in the thread that exists for ridiculous hyperbole!

Balladeer wrote:

It's all very well, Nintendo introducing this machine that can be played on the telly or in bed, but did they stop and think that the Switch might be too convenient?  That people with low attention spans might, by its off-telly antics, be able to be distracted into playing Smash at any time when they should be doing something else?  That this convenience might, in fact, destroy lives!?

No.  No they did not.

I genuinely came in from work tonight about 8:15pm, intending to cook dinner and do a yoga session before settling down for the evening - should have been ready to relax for about 9:30pm or so. I walked into my room, spotted my Switch, said to myself "ach, I'll have a few battles on the Spirit Board before dinner" and fired up Smash. I didn't start making dinner until 9:30... they have constructed digital crack.