Snacks! Reviews/'reviews' welcome

(Youtube in spoiler.)

Spoiler:

Balladeer: The Snack

*Wrong
*Becoming a snack is just pandering and makes me feel patronized

1%

I'm with Balla, Creme egg's are disgusting.

You know who else is disgusting? Super Frank. Yeah, eat dem apples.

600 Haribo Goldbears (from the internet)

The "from the internet" bit is important because from experience I have realised the quality of sweets varies greatly depending on where they are purchased, for example WHSmith Goldbears are perfect and squishy but overpriced and Home Bargains Goldbears are cheap and hard and probably out of date.

My first thought when I saw these was "600 goldbears for £6? thats like my own personal Goldbear army" and ordered them instantly. So the first thing I did when they arrived was count them obviously, I counted them in 5's while transporting them to a smaller container so it would be easier to store my new bear army.



Pros
They are bears.
The red ones and white ones taste awesome
There's lots of them
They are bears

Cons
There is only 597 of them
They dont quite fit in my other container
The dark orange ones look red so I keep expecting the awesome red flavour and getting the not so awesome orange flavour
The yellow ones suck
Counting 597 Goldbears takes ages

72%

Agree that the red and white Gummy Bears are far superior to the others, especially the yellow ones.

And they can sing and dance!

EDIT: Creme Eggs are an abomination. The inside looks like a bird pooped in monkey jizz, and you feel dizzyingly sick after one drop of the stuff.

nupkin wrote:

And they can sing and dance!

I am tempted to ban you for trolling.

nupkin wrote:

EDIT: Creme Eggs are an abomination. The inside looks like a bird pooped in monkey jizz, and you feel dizzyingly sick after one drop of the stuff.

You are both as wrong as one another, clearly this is a love which is meant to be. In wrongness.

beemoh wrote:

nupkin wrote:

EDIT: Creme Eggs are an abomination. The inside looks like a bird pooped in monkey jizz, and you feel dizzyingly sick after one drop of the stuff.

You are both as wrong as one another, clearly this is a love which is meant to be. In wrongness.

I've actually seen bird poop and monkey jizz (long, long story) and that is kinda accurate...

beemoh wrote:

nupkin wrote:

EDIT: Creme Eggs are an abomination. The inside looks like a bird pooped in monkey jizz, and you feel dizzyingly sick after one drop of the stuff.

You are both as wrong as one another, clearly this is a love which is meant to be. In wrongness.

Agreed. There are some sick sick people in this thread.

Well quite...

NintenDUCK wrote:

I've actually seen bird poop and monkey jizz (long, long story) and that is kinda accurate...

First your friends licking you and now this?

NintenDUCK wrote:

I've actually seen bird poop and monkey jizz (long, long story) and that is kinda accurate...

Please - oh please, share.

Well since you asked so nicely. Last year my school organised a trip to Spain for those doing spanish, natch. So I decided I'd go and it all went jolly well too (aside from one of our group having 200 euros stolen in a shopping centre) until, on the penultimate day of our 5-day trip we went to the lump of rock that is Gibraltar and gosh is it nice. Our teachers then had the delightfully original idea of taking the cable car to the top of the wittingly dubbed 'Rock Of Gibraltar' in order to see these little guys:

Spoiler:

And the babies were delightfully cute and cuddly and full of the zest of youth that comes with being a monkey. The grown ups however were filled with a different sort of zest, a lust if you will, as we found out when we approached a certain monkey sitting on the railings apparently grooming it's downstairs so naturally the girls wanted a closer look to some better snaps... (can you tell what it is yet?)
One of the braver girls even decided to stand beside this seemingly very vain monkey to get several pictures, this is when the 'excitement' really became apparent as the brave little monkey proceeded to ejaculate all over the poor would-be monkey model, most of it landing in her hair and some more, erm, squirts going over the girls who luckily acted as a human sperm shield for myself and the others
As for the bird poop, there is an awful lot atop that rock so it isn't hard to imagine. :cyclops:

Gibraltar is a lovely place, you should go there there, it's a lovely place...

Must remember this when the annual GNamer Awards come around. One of several "ones to beat" for funniest post! (Guest's review is another one, of course.)

Gwyn400 wrote:

600 Haribo Goldbears (from the internet)

The "from the internet" bit is important because from experience I have realised the quality of sweets varies greatly depending on where they are purchased, for example WHSmith Goldbears are perfect and squishy but overpriced and Home Bargains Goldbears are cheap and hard and probably out of date.

My first thought when I saw these was "600 goldbears for £6? thats like my own personal Goldbear army" and ordered them instantly. So the first thing I did when they arrived was count them obviously, I counted them in 5's while transporting them to a smaller container so it would be easier to store my new bear army.



Pros
They are bears.
The red ones and white ones taste awesome
There's lots of them
They are bears

Cons
There is only 597 of them
They dont quite fit in my other container
The dark orange ones look red so I keep expecting the awesome red flavour and getting the not so awesome orange flavour
The yellow ones suck
Counting 597 Goldbears takes ages

72%

Thank you for taking the time to arrange and count them bears, one of the best bear armies I've seen.

Cheers for that Nintenduck, quality quality story.

NintenDUCK wrote:

story

Yes, but how did it taste?

Like a Creme Egg, I'd imagine.

Probably better.

NintenDUCK wrote:

Well since you asked so nicely. Last year my school organised a trip to Spain for those doing spanish, natch. So I decided I'd go and it all went jolly well too (aside from one of our group having 200 euros stolen in a shopping centre) until, on the penultimate day of our 5-day trip we went to the lump of rock that is Gibraltar and gosh is it nice. Our teachers then had the delightfully original idea of taking the cable car to the top of the wittingly dubbed 'Rock Of Gibraltar' in order to see these little guys:

Spoiler:

And the babies were delightfully cute and cuddly and full of the zest of youth that comes with being a monkey. The grown ups however were filled with a different sort of zest, a lust if you will, as we found out when we approached a certain monkey sitting on the railings apparently grooming it's downstairs so naturally the girls wanted a closer look to some better snaps... (can you tell what it is yet?)
One of the braver girls even decided to stand beside this seemingly very vain monkey to get several pictures, this is when the 'excitement' really became apparent as the brave little monkey proceeded to ejaculate all over the poor would-be monkey model, most of it landing in her hair and some more, erm, squirts going over the girls who luckily acted as a human sperm shield for myself and the others
As for the bird poop, there is an awful lot atop that rock so it isn't hard to imagine. :cyclops:

Gibraltar is a lovely place, you should go there there, it's a lovely place...

You know when they say models that the camera loves them? I think the feeling was mutual for this one.

Fox's Party Mini Rings



Pros:

Crunchy biscuit
Great texture - the icing is class
Moreish!
Cheap
Loads in the packet

Cons:

Spot The Difference quiz on the back of the packet was too easy
Too dry for some?

86%

Whether celebrating your fifth birthday at a children's play centre and wearing a cone hat or at a stag snorting coke off of a hooker's stomach, a party isn't a party without Party Rings. Ace.

Phillips wrote:

Whether celebrating your fifth birthday at a children's play centre and wearing a cone hat or at a stag snorting coke off of a hooker's stomach

You, sir, should have been at my fifth birthday.

Phillips wrote:

Too dry for some?

Yeah, I find this to be the case. Still a cracking biscuit, especially with a glass of milk to go with it.